What we always carry, memories.

Memories are tricky things. You always cling to them, you live with the help of memories. You hold to them like a fainting scent of a perfume. You always wish they come to life and things fall in place. But you know that it is not possible and just smile. You just want to revive those moments and the people in it. You remember those memories in the darkest moments as a relief or escape from the depression that you are having. You still have the hope that the horizon is not far. They slip through your hands like the thin sand. The memories of your childhood and your youth in which you are growing mature. Life continues that way. You carve on your memories like you are living them again when you actually not living them. In the following years, you will remember all those laughs, jokes, stupid things that you always used to do, those special people in your life, the tears, the hugs and the flattering words from that person whom you admire. You will want the tears to wet your cheeks again and the arms to keep you warm from the cold that you are feeling but it is not possible anymore. Can you ever imagine a life without memories? I simply can't. You could always feel something is missing in your life. But one can't turn back the time.

Memories are clingy things. Also the sad ones.  You remember to bring them to life or remind yourself of a certain blessing or how life could be more harsh. You remember your long gone loved ones. You remember how stupid you used to be. You remember your first slap from your teacher. You remember your first heartbreak. You remember your first wave goodbye the one whom you don't know when you will see him again. You remember how you used to think about your crush the whole day and smile to yourself. You remember how you used to crack jokes to the friends whom you can no longer call your own. You remember the way you used to fall off the bed when you had a nightmare. You can only sigh.  You sigh because you know those times can never return back again. Remembrance of these things can become a torture now. But you still remember. The first touch of a hand, first eye lock and last tearful words.

When I say that memories are tricky things, they are. They remind you what you lost and what you gained. They make you regret what you have in life now and how you lost those things once. They remain there to remind you that you could have done better. How wrong you have been at the time. If only you were smarter. When you should have stepped up for yourself, you let others walk on you and at the end of the day you feel like crap. To whom you should have said ''I love you'' instead you bid goodbye in a state of fear of losing him forever. After all memories are all you are going to have forever. Memories are all you are going to wish to revive once again. Memories are the things that are going to make you realize your joys, sorrows, regrets and mistakes. Memories only. And memories will always support you throughout your life.